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  • Jesse Pimpinella

First Day of Class



NEW BLOG EVERY TUESDAY

Here are a few tips that may help you in class or not. I don't know. I am no expert. I'm just a guy that ramble nonsense in a microphone!

1) GO TO CLASS

I love how numerous survival guides have this as number one! Why? Isn't going to class the point of reading the survival. It's like getting a book for sailing and you open it up "Chapter 1: Flying Airplanes and You.

2) MAKE A GOOD IMPRESSION:

First day of class means first impressions. I was good at first impressions like McDonalds is good at customers with 6 pack abs!

Screw it! Brown nose it up, but make sure that shit doesn't stain your nose! Be friendly so that the teacher may be willing to give you break.

3) GET A GOOD SEAT:

I prefer sitting near the back so that I have laptop options. Yes, throw Netflix on mute and you can enjoy the latest episode of Orange is the New Black. At least you can tell other you are reading and that isn't a lie. But this can go wrong in many ways. I remember on class where a guy got caught for watching porn. Then again, he was in the front row, and no one in class appreciated a DP scene in the AM.

4) PROBABLY DON’T BUY YOUR BOOKS THAT DAY:

Don't! Books are a scam. I remember one class the book was never used. It was like a 3D movies for the blind! Also you can find some textbooks online legally and (cough) no so legally. If it's a crime, then I will be sent to the chair very soon!

5) MAKE SYMBIOTIC AND/OR REAL FRIENDS

Remember Finding Nemo with the anemone and the clown fish characters. They take care of each other, but it's not like a personal relationship. Anemone didn't have lines. My point is that you will need that one random person that will answer your texts at night when you are clueless about an assignment. Like a academic booty call. "U up?"......"I need a drilling.....on our literature test."

#School #Class #Funny #ClassroomCOmedy

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Created by Jesse Pimpinella