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BLOG: Wall Twerks, Coffee, and 2019

Jesse Pimpinella

While I was on the road, I stopped at a coffee shop. I tend to chat with strangers randomly. It was then I was informed of a person's whimsical woe. The woman began,

So Jesse, here is what happened. I was at a party where alcohol was involved.

I'll stop here. Usually, when the phrase "Where alcohol was involved," a person is about to state that "I have performed an action that I normally would not do." Let's continue,

The girls at the party were "wall twerking," which is where a person perform a hand stand facing the wall with there feet on the wall. At this point the person begins to twerk.

Now, while this task seem ridiculous, it's a mating ritual none the less. A peacock flaunts their feathers. If a peacock had no feathers, then the peacock would appear to be twerking. I do not know. I did not pay much attention in school.

She continues

I gave it a shot, but as I was doing this I hear a click and CRACK! I was brought to the hospital. The doctor found I had slipped a disk in my back and also broke my wrists.

Now, she could have been screwing with me, but damn! What the hell? What do I do with this information. How do I purge my brain of this classic fable of butt wiggling? Oh i have a blog. So here we are!


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