"Is It Possible to Have the Best of Both Worlds: Preferring Married Life While Living Single Vicariously Through Friends?"

I love being married! I HATED BEING SINGLE

Being single in the 90s & 2000s may have been glamorous, but with the birth of dating apps and swiping right, dating now feels automated; like you are making a order on Amazon

Whatever happen to running into a person that you find attractive and striking up a conversation? Oh wait...that involved eye contact and social skills. Don't get me wrong, people have found love on the apps, but it was never my preference.

Which is why I married my best friend from high school. We had it all; history, secrets, and shared trauma from school theater.

I love living single vicariously through my friends because their stories are so amazing! Way better than mine!

My Friends: "So she came in with an anime wig and whispered the dirtiest Japanese phrase in my ears before we got hot and heavy. Jesse how was your evening? "

ME: "My old lady and I rubbed icy hot on each others back before we got into bed to watch Love on the Spectrum."

I am not saying I am bored with my life. I find plenty of excitement with my wife. I'm just saying that my friend are essentially like video game. It's like Grand Theft Auto, I don't want to fuck a hooker....but I going to get my character to do it because...why not!

Bottom Line: It is a blast to get involved with my friend's dating lives because at the end of the day the dating world today is fascinating like lion taming. You can talk to me about it all day, but you will never see my fat ass in a cage yelling "Down Simba Down!"