Horror Movie Insurance
Aren't you sick and tired of investing in an abandoned camp, reopening it and suddenly having a vicious ghost slasher killing your customers? How will you recover financially?
That is why I am presenting to investors: HORROR MOVIE INSURANCE!
For years, escaped mental patients, teenagers accidentally reading from the Necronomicon Ex Mortis and more have cause countless death and terror, while small business owners have been suffering. Haddonfield goes through a minor recession every Halloween, matteress sales are down in Springfield, OH, especially near Elm Street, and summer cabin resorts are nonexistent near Crystal Lake. Don't let your business drown like an unsupervised Voorhees child.
But, where will the money come from? This is why we need to make these so called "Horror Icons" pay! Along with our insurance team, we have a legal team working around the clock ready to get you compensated. We don't care if it's Friday, Jason pays. We don't care if you are Freddy, legal action will be ready. Michael Myers, our legal team will never tire.
Don't be caught off guard. Be ready or anything with us!
Your Hot Mess,
Jesse
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